It's almost time.
The sweet summer breeze touches my face as the sun begins to set.
Three words occupy my being. They come and go crushing rhythmically like waves hitting the shore.
I never tried. I never tried. I never tried.
Tears start streaming down my cheeks.
I'm sitting alone on the bench I used to sit with my wife gazing the vast ocean she loved so much.
The inscription on the bench keeps me company,
"To the best wife, mother and grandmother anyone could ask for. You saw light in everyone. We miss you."
It's time. I have to make my way back.
Regret envelops me but guilt keeps me around another day.
I start walking. My shadow reluctantly folllows me home.
The day is gone. I never tried.
The notion of taking things for granted is an epidemic that affects everyone on this planet and extends from the material to the spiritual realm. We have grown up with a false sense of entitlement to things that will not leave us any better off having acquired them. The sentence I’ve heard so many times and probably said myself at some points in my life, “I just want to know what I am entitled to, nothing more, nothing less”.
Well, life has a way of teaching us that we are entitled to this life, to oxygen and water and all the wonderful creations that nature provides. When we separate ourself from the rest of the world and we just focus solely on endless quests just to satisfy the ego, we detach ourself from even the most fundamental elements of life, oxygen. We become stiff, we don’t allow breath to escape and we are getting in our own way.
It is such a difficult place to be in and operate from, without any hope of escaping. When we interfere with our breathing, oxygen doesn’t get into the body, our thinking gets cloudy, our energy levels drop and we become OCD with just a single though that can’t be solved or cannot be and never will. At that point we lack perspective, objective judgement and are doomed to enter a downward spiral.
However unpleasant such states may be, they have a purpose and a usefulness. They are a teacher of sorts. We just have to show up and pay attention. We have been brought up in this world of dualism, where we can tell good by getting to know evil. We realise that we are human beings and not human doings. We thing, finding solutions to our problems that by the way only exist in our head, is the answer. There isn’t only one way to anything. It might be that we need to ask slightly different questions instead of fixating on this answer finding marathon. We may find that there is wisdom and a way in the small things that we take for granted.
Start from this moment on, realising that we have a miraculous body that was provided for us to experience this life and runs perfectly when not interrupted. Being grateful is not just semantics, it is reality. Change your attitude to life, even before you rise. Say Thank you. Life will respond back. Some words to repeat in the morning.
Thanks You.
I am well. I am healthy. I am vibrant.
When operation from a state of gratitude, we allow our mind to generate frequencies that look for and attract new opportunities that were previously covered with a dark veil.
Doors are opening all the time, but we can’t see them, because we are so fixated on the one door that closed.
Our mind starts seeing connections and coincidence and synchronicity appear in our life. We start anticipating these events and look forward to what each day will bring.
]]>If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change. - Dr. Wayne Dyer
When we are not aware of our ego, we are destined to ask this question operating from a place ego. Thus, our answer will always be in a way that serves the ego, but not ourself or our soul.
When we becomes aware of the existence of ego and its overreaching reigns, that’s when we realise that our life so far, has not been one of choice, but one of obedience and service to the ego. We can only begin to understand the power of ego over us, by examining our thoughts. Every action begins as a thought.
This life of ours is a gift. It is a miracle how we come into existence. Everything is taken care for us by a higher power, god, source whatever you believe it to be. As we originate from this higher power, so we are a part of it.
The society, well meaning parents and our environment, teach us from a young age, that we are separate from everything else. We get conditioned to listen to the voice of the ego. As Dr. Wayne Dyer explained in the movie “The Shift”, ego has an agenda.
Ego tells us that we are what we have. The more material goods we accumulate, the more we are. The trouble with this notion, is that when we loose these material possessions, we lose who we are in the process.
The next step that ego teaches us, is that we are what we do. We are our jobs and the respect and recognition that comes with it. This is so dangerous as most people identify their self with what they do and if this is taken away, they die.
The opinion of others about us, is another working of the ego. We are what others think we are and not what our own nature tell us.
The notion of being separate from everyone around us and thus disconnected is another false idea that has been embedded in our thinking patterns.
The final item on the ego’s agenda is separation from god. We are led to believe that we are this body that we have and we are the ones that can control everything, even things outside of our control. The belief that we are separate from god and don’t need anything is to deny our own nature. Deny ourself.
When you deny yourself how can you appreciate yourself? How much room for thinking and feeling your soul is there?
Our life is a gift. Our body is a vehicle. Our soul embraces the universe.
Listening to stories from people who had near death experiences there is a repeating theme. Most people will describe that they could see their body from above and could feel as being one with everything. They could feel what everyone was feeling and it was ever expanding.
Thinking ourself as a part of god, makes us appreciate who we are without external prerequisites and conditions. To honour our soul is to embrace the notion of its limitlessness and start thinking outside the boundaries of our physical body.
As Dr. Wayne Dyer’s teacher responded when asked what was real, he said:
Real is that which never changes
We have been in many bodies since childhood and we are going to be in many more as we grow. What is real is your soul. Honour it.
]]>There is a point where we start asking ourselves if this is all there is? We don’t need to struggle but rather let go. Let go of worrying. Let go of stress. Let go of ego.
The ego drives us. We were born whole and complete and ego makes us believe that we are not and we will never be. The moment we let go, the moment we are free from ego, that moment we can start living a life of purpose. The purpose of ours is a calling that we have buried deep inside. We make so much noise that it cannot be heard.
We don’t want to die with our music still inside us.
The music is there, we just have to play it. Be quiet and listen for it. Everyone’s journey is going to be different. Adopting a minimalistic lifestyle is one of the ways, if we are to be free. Live light is an interesting proposition. What does that look like? Less possessions? I have always had an aversion to over decorated houses and traveling with half the house in my luggages. The feeling of freedom is both literal and metaphorical. I once read a blog from the minimalists on how to become a minimalist. The concept is quite simple. Pack all of your belongings in brown boxes as if you were moving houses. Every day take out of the boxes the items you only need to use. In 30 days you will have used exactly the things you need.
The rest you can throw away, donate and sell. How many people do you know who are ready to detach themselves from possessions for the sake of their freedom? Very few.
As Wayne Dyer says in the documentary “The Shift”, everything is provided by a higher power the first 9 months of our lives. Why not trust that this higher source has everything else taken care of for the rest of our lives?
The ego is trying to make us believe that we are separate from this higher source and that we don’t need this connection. We need to let go of the ego and let our light spread. We are the light as we are one with god and god is everything.
Letting go of the ego, is not a trivial task but it takes daily practise. This isn’t about effort and struggle but rather not doing anything. To not be guided by our ego. How would your life be different if you knew all you needed was within you right now?
]]>All is need is within me right now.
The same goes for this day, this moment. We have a choice. Most of the time, as there are situations we have gotten ourselves into that enslave us for the days ahead of us. We can’t shake these off. Not without careful planning.
Acknowledging that we are in a position to make a change and we only can do this, is the first step to change. Splitting the day into phases, to carry out what we have committed ourselves into and then working trough a process of eliminating, delegating and removing elements from our lives that don’t serve us anymore is a worthwhile plan.
Nothing comes out of stagnation. We want to get to a point of action instead or reaction. Where we can choose our actions and be calm and serene. There is no better place to be. A place of choice and action. We grow up this way. Ready to take action and leap into the unknown and explore.
Somewhere along the way, we assume baggages from our environment, that we think we need to adopt in order to belong. Just by doing so, we inherit beliefs that we don’t want, don’t serve us, but we are made to believe that we must serve them. These make for a reactive person that can never seem to be able to catch up with life.
It is a race that we don’t know when it is going to end and how. There is no finish line. Action and motion is how mother nature intended us to be. We can’t have progress without action. Nothing validates a belief faster than action. That is positive beliefs. I’m not going anywhere near negative, destructive thoughts and beliefs. These are a cancer.
The fact of the matter is that action in our consumerism society is only being promoted towards buying things you don’t need, with money you don’t have, to impress people you don’t like. How sad is that?
Why do we behave like pre-historic creatures? In 2016? I can’t believe that you haven’t heard that we are being manipulated from the media and TV. It is called television programming for a reason. All that is to say that action is not enough to bring change. It has to be conscious action that leads to the results we want. Mastering action to the point that allows and leads to a clearer mind, not clouded by noise and smoke, is the epitome of a successful and joyous life.
We are what we think and we are the average of our closest five people. Whether these people have chosen to lead a life of choice and action, will define our thinking and actions. I’ve heard once the 33% rule. Associate yourself with 33% of people that live below your means, 33% of people who are at the same level as you and 33% with people that are doing much better that you. This will reset your barometer and drive the quality of your actions.
It will take time to transition from reaction to action, but once that milestone arrives, it is the beginning of a new chapter in your life. Things will never be the same.
We are what we repeatedly do. Aristotle.
You could also make a list of actions that you would like to incorporate into your day. Just a simple act of kindness can do so much for you, as for others. Acts of love for your family and your friends. Acts of helpfulness towards complete strangers or people who are in need. Nothing miraculous will happen immediately, unless you start incorporating small acts into your day.
Finding time during your days of reaction, to act as you would everyday.
I have been through this and I know how it can affect the mind, the body and the soul. Forgetting that this body of ours is a tiny spectacle contained within the vastness of our soul. It is a pity to make our soul feel trapped just so that we can be well adjusted in profoundly sick environments.
Don’t do that.
Unleash your mind, unleash your superpowers. You are the depiction of greatness and you need to let this out for the world to see.
You were born a miracle, act like one.
Thank you.
]]>These thoughts are mostly negative. That is our brain’s built-in defence system. The amygdala. It has been there forever. Its main mission it to protect us. Protect us from known and imaginary danger.
As the day unfolds, you will unavoidably reach a point of despair. This is not intentional but rather expected. That’s the point of when you need to take charge. The brain’s mission is survival, not happiness.
The observation that despair is followed by hope, is quite true. If you’ve been at your lowest, everything else seems hopeful.
The feeling of despair is to be construed, nothing more than a wake up call. It is a sign that we need to grab the steering wheel, otherwise we are doomed to crash and burn. Hope is useful and can sustain us at times of hardships. However, you aren’t going to escape this vicious cycle between despair and hope, if all you do is hope.
Hope is a beggar. Faith is what you need. Hope walks through the fire and faith leaps over it.
Having faith in something bigger that yourself, resets your expectations and makes you grateful. The fact that we perceive our body as all it is and all it is going to be, is a fallacy. Our soul is limitless.
Our soul is not contained within the limits of our body. Our body is contained within the limitlessness of our soul. I never expected Jim Carey to speak such truths, but he does.
Faith is key, if you are to reach what you are longing for. There is no shortcuts. No do overs. You only have one life and you choose how to direct it and create your masterpiece.
Starting today, take note of your thoughts and feelings for the day. If your day was happy overall, make a smiley face on your calendar. Repeat this for a week and you will have a snapshot of your quality of life. If you don’t like it. Change it.
You are not a tree, you can move. Deep rooted thoughts, fears and worries are to be used constructively. Stop avoiding them. Face them. Dance with them. Relief is inevitable.
Tasks and actions we postpone, because we don’t know where to start or require time for contemplating these, become snowballs. Ask different questions about them. Momentary despair is good. Use that feeling of despair to attack those tasks. Have faith though that there is a solution at the point when despair has overtaken you and push past that familiar ground.
]]>Despair is useful. Hope is good. Faith is essential.
Love is a such a phenomenon. You can’t describe it exactly, as it means different things to different people. We feel it though. You can sense love when you walk into a house or you are in the presence of others. It is either love or its absence. A void or something entirely negative. The vibration from the people who live in that house affects their environment and everyone who comes into its range.
You can tell, straight away when love is present. It is omnipotent. It can be felt in the silence. It causes the creation of those chemicals, that our brain can only compose, that silences the incessant stream of thoughts. At that moment you know. There are no more questions occupying your mind.
Love has many faces. They are all different and unique in their own way. They are all instinctual and wonderful.
Blessed are the people who have had the pleasure to enjoy and give all kinds of love in their lifetime.
The love for your parents, your wife, your kids. We know from psychology that they are 3 levels of love. The way we approach our relationships defines the level of love each enjoys.
There is the first level of love whereby being selfish and only trying to receive love from others without giving any love to yourself or others. The second level is giving love to others, only in proportion to the love you receive. The third level, which we all should aspire to achieve, is providing unconditional love to yourself and others without expecting anything in return.That is the stage where pure love is present and there is doubt or questions.
We do spend a great amount of time during the day thinking, almost 60000 thoughts per day, asking and answering questions in our minds about everything. Unconditional love is one of these phenomenons that have such a strong vibration that can cure everything.
There is one condition in all of the above. You have to be present. Most people are preoccupied with negative thoughts and situations they either can’t control or affect in a way. Negativity is a disease in the literal sense of the word. It puts our body out of ease and causes imbalance.
We have to consciously understand what our mind is focusing on from the moment we wake up and direct it. Otherwise, vibrations like love are blocked out and we seize to feel those emotions we dream of.
Louise Hay’s morning meditation is an excellent way to reset yourself in the morning, before the day gets a hold you. When you feel loved by yourself you allow love to flow freely to and from others. The words we use and speak change our biochemistry.
Go to the mirror and say to yourself, I love you. Our eyes are not only for seeing but also used as projectors. They project the stories we make up in our minds. When you see love in your own eyes, you will know.
I am at peace now and all is well.
]]>We seemingly find that educated people have manners, but that isn’t the rule. Sometimes people that have received schooling feel that they have an earned right to be arrogant. The same people are the ones who start wars to kill thousands of people in the name of peace.
There is a lot to be said about manners but the most striking observation is that manners are taught and practised daily. You can’t buy manners. You start very young, learning from your family and you environment what constitutes good manners and what is acceptable. There are cultural differences at play here but for the most part, you environment will define you.
Manners are the what separates us from cannibals, not animals. Animals have manners too. Manners are part of the first impressions we get of someone we meet. It reveals so much about their belief system, their worries, fears and what they have been through. It also shows what are their values and priorities.
You can tell if someone is a narcissist and self-centred even before they speak. It is amazing how we don’t pay any attention to what we project to others through our behaviour. We are taught “good manners” from a young age and most certainly in school. It almost always revolve around being quiet, doing your job and not saying anything more than you have been asked.
Freedom of expression plays a role in how we develop manners. The how is somewhat debatable when the schooling establishment engineers into our brain, through repetition and scoring systems, an acceptable school of thought, that we translate later in life as justified behaviour. That drives us and develops our behaviours and mannerisms.
Concepts like, love, compassion, grace, active listening are low in the schooling system and thus instead instil us with a set of mannerisms equivalent of machine logic.
Life isn’t always about bigger, faster, better. We do need progress, otherwise we die, but reflection and meditation is our compass.
We need to educate ourselves beyond the schooling we have been subjected too, willingly or not. Continuous learning and knowing how to deduce knowledge from an abundance of information sources is a worthwhile goal.
Getting to know ourselves better and examining our behaviours and our manners and how they came to be is an important exercise.
Starting by observing our own inner monologue, as if we were an outside spectator, watching it on the theatre of our mind.
Be kind to yourself. Be grateful.
The past is in the past. No one is judging. Start fresh this moment.
Out with the old beliefs that don’t serve you anymore and in with the new insights about you.
We can’t contribute to others if we are empty inside.
]]>I believe that everyone has the capacity to be compassionate but not everyone does. It is a limitless well of love and understanding but it somehow stays dormant in most people. The problem lies in the way we are being brought up. It is passed down by our parents and society. Environment plays a big part too. We have adopted the idea that we, humans have the power over all living and non-living things on this planet and therefore we must take advantage of it to our best interest.
We have been taking advantage of our planet for the few last centuries but with greed as our guide and not compassion. Greed has poisoned our souls and blinded us. We have lost compassion for our environment, that so abundantly provides the most precious goods, which without it, we would be dead in a minute. That is oxygen.
Yet, we have no compassion when it comes to deforesting the earth to make paper. Just because the wood lobby would not benefit by using hemp as the primary source of paper 200 years ago. One acre of hemp produces the same amount of paper as 5 acres of trees.
I have concluded that compassion is a notion that should be part of our education. Learning to appreciate the earth that provides for us nutrients for our body and other material for clothing and housing. There is such a disconnect from reality these days that a kid growing up now can recognise over 100 brand logos but not a single plant. Therefore, our newest generations would rightly assume that food comes from McDonalds.
Being compassionate to our environment and others is something to aspire to become but it doesn’t happen overnight. The more you can disconnect from the material world that is made up around us and start connecting with the physical world, the sooner you can start appreciating that nature’s compassion has no limits towards our destructive behaviour.
Another concept that we don’t learn in schools is kindness.
When was the last time you killed a spider?
It seems so tiny and so insignificant but it has a place here. That primarily stems from lack of love and kindness to ourselves. We are harsh and unjust to us. We criticise and judge ourself about our actions and mistakes and we almost never acknowledge our successes. We expect others to do that for us.
What is person left with when he is abusive to himself and seeks approval and praise from others?
Alone.
It is almost impossible to be kind to others if you always criticise yourself. However, there are cases that people believe that they deserve to be miserable and being kind to others is more appropriate, as the ones who diverse it more.
You wouldn’t accept someone being rude to you but you do this to yourself every minute of the day. Take the time to weed out these beliefs that hold you back and stop justifying these behaviours to yourself.
Kindness to ourselves can have astonishing results for the whole world. We affect our environment, with the thoughts we have and the energy we emit.
]]>The lack of human touch and connection erodes moral traits that have been passed down by previous generations. Without honour we would still be cavemen. Although this could be debated as well. There was something honourable in striving to survive. We are not striving to survive in the same way anymore; are we?
Although we are not being chased by wild animals, there is an invisible digital world that plays out in our head that manifests itself in the real world. There are some many projects going on at once and this creates an inner turmoil. Nothing is visible externally to others. It looks like, as if we could be occupied by nothing. Just staring at a computer screen, agonising to get something done, something not able to account for.
The mere fact that we set out to accomplish something; anything and we don’t get there, starts to dilute our own being. We can’t keep our word to ourselves anymore. That’s when shame sets in and we start to perceive ourselves as dishonourable people. It doesn’t take much to go down this path. It could be just not having sent that email you promised to someone. The disappointment that overcomes us, it two-fold. We fail to be true to our word for us and then to somebody else.
These feelings of unworthiness in the grand scheme of things is minute, but it is enough to take us down a dark path.
That’s when taking hold of your brain and affirming to yourself the truth is the turning point. There is no point lying to yourself. That is the last thing you want to do. Accept things as they are and set a new starting point. The past is the past. You can’t change what you did a minute ago, but you can learn and don’t repeat it the next.
The psychological fallacies that succumb us, are partly to blame but lack of education is the real culprit here. Learning how to interpret what is happening to you, is key for prioritising your life and do what you said you were going to do.
There is nothing worst than a lifetime having gone by and realising at the end of your days that you allowed circumstances and things outside of your control to be your excuse for not being true to yourself and honouring your words.
Small steps today, make giant leaps in a year from now.
Start today to honour yourself, by reflecting, prioritising and valuing your words and your actions. Don’t follow the path of least resistance with everyone else.
Think before you speak and don’t speak before you have a sense of the weight of your words.
Thank you.
]]>There must be a point in the a point in the day for reflection and evaluation. What did I learn today? What can I use as a guide tomorrow? This is something most of us don’t do and we’re bound to repeat the same mistakes.
When it happens a few days in a row; that is we fail to learn from our mistakes, we end up rolling out of bed and into days of anger, bitterness and disappointment. There is no escaping this moment of despair or so we think and feel. There is another version of ourselves in a parallel universe that is happy, fulfilled and jumps out of bed each morning to seize the day. What are they doing differently?
Perhaps they say NO more often, as much as to other people, as they do to themselves. Self-discipline is a catalytic component in making strides towards your imagined life. It is the glue that creates tangible, measurable progress that propels you even closer to what is possible. Being able to say no to yourself, when procrastination creeps in, and it does when our self-discipline is watered down by what we see as obstacles, is the golden point we must recognise.
Procrastination is a survival mechanism.
It kicks in when our brain turns on the fight or flight response and deems it appropriate to postpone what we might perceive life threatening or a threat to our day. The facades of procrastination are countless, as it adjusts itself to our current situation and circumstances. Watching TV or binge watching Netflix when you should be writing that book or buying things you don’t need, to occupy your time and your mind.
That is a consequence of dreading your days. Yet life is not eternal. We are here for a short time in the grand scheme of things and piss it down the drain. Love is infinity. Love is eternal. Now that is a notion worth adopting into our lives and making it full and long. Love is as fluid and clear as the water and has the ability to cleanse itself like the water does.
We never learn such things in school. It isn’t in the curriculum. It doesn’t get you a job. What about getting a life?
The main concern is survival and not living. That’s the schooling system’s product. That’s not reality, it is a delusion.
Grace is another misplaced word in our education. Grace is reality. Observing nature, one will find that from the tiniest flower to the biggest tree, there is grace in their demeanour and how they move with the wind. That reminds me of a verse from a poem about perseverance and change. Good Timber.
Good timber does not grow with ease: The stronger wind, the stronger trees;
Adopt grace in your every day and every activity. It will make things more interesting. When I come to think of it again, we love to be in the company of other people who have grace and love for life.
]]>